So, if you are familiar with my life at all, you know that I have experienced some changes over the last year.
For example, I've had to buy some new pants.
Actually, new shorts if you want to be specific. It's because my favorite grey shorts (also known as the greytest shorts of all time) ripped. In a big way. Like, an into-the-trash-goodbye-forever kind of way.
Not even going to lie, I cried about it. I bought those shorts the summer before freshman year at AU, and wore them probably three times a week any time it was warm enough outside. They fit PERFECTLY through semesters and summers, mission trips and vacations, bike rides and hikes. Seriously, the best shorts ever. If I could have incorporated them into a quilt or something I so would've. I share many many memories with those shorts! We were friends. (Just kidding! ...sort of.) I was in denial when they started to wear out a little, until it happened. I was doing a very normal activity at the beginning of last summer, and they ripped apart...diagonally across my left thigh. More than ripped, they were frayed and torn past the point of repair. I think I kept them for weeks. Just folded up like normal in my closet. Before the wedding, I caved and bought a new "replacement" pair, (as if they could be replaced!) and one day while cleaning I finally took the old ones out with the trash and tossed them.
Honestly, if I look at a picture that I am wearing those shorts in, I miss them.
Let's get real though, we all know that even though they were a fantastic article of clothing, throwing out those (old and really worn out) shorts sort of marked the end of a season of life.
Was I really THAT upset over a pair of shorts? Maybe a little.
Was I extremely nervous about getting married, moving to a new city, finding a job, making new friends, being a "grown up"? Yes.
Emotional about it? To the max.
I was processing, protecting, crying. SO MUCH CRYING. (Sorry, Tan.) Feeling homesick, then guilty. Adventurous, but lost. Uncomfortable, but safe. Discouraged, then excited. I listened to all my favorite break-up songs with my iPod turned up too loud like 15-year-old-me while I drove around and tried to figure out where Wal Mart was and cleaned this new apartment that didn't smell or look like it was mine.
But He is faithful. To be with us, to provide, to love, protect, comfort, and strengthen. As if I didn't already have enough evidence of the Lord's faithfulness in my life (Junior High, anyone?), the last year has been overflowing with it.
You know what else He is faithful to do? Change us. Mold and grow and cleanse and refine us into the people He has planned for us to be.
And if I drop the ball? Forget who I am? Let fear keep me still?
if we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself.
2 Timothy 2:13
Those shorts did absolutely no good sitting in my closet after they were torn up. All they did is remind me that I needed to go buy a new pair.
So I did. Then, I hung new pictures of us on the wall, cooked my favorite foods and attempted to cook his, watched old favorite movies and new favorite movies, found a church, ate at new restaurants, hung up a bird feeder, got a dog, made some really awesome new friends, got a great new job, found a park to walk through, and fought off a nest of wasps that were living in our chimney (Tanner fought, I "helped"). And somewhere in there the sadness was replaced with nostalgia and thankfulness, we met some cool people, learned about how God uses us to sharpen one another, and #407 became home. The new shorts aren't the same perfect color, but they are a really great different perfect color.
Sometimes, He tells me it's time for some new shorts. Not necessarily because the old ones are suddenly no good anymore, but because He has some that are going to be better.
Transitions are tough, but they are always worth it. His good is so much greater than mine. I enjoy changes, just not the changing. I dig my heels in, but the Lord takes my hands and pulls me onward.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided-
"Great is Thy faithfulness," Lord, unto me!
Hello Tori Harris. So good to know you through your profile on the blogger and the blog post. I am glad to stop by your blog post and it is so encouraging to go through it. I am a Pastor from Mumbai, India and I love to get connected with the people of God around the world to be encouraged, strengthen and praying for one another. I have been in the Pastoral ministry for last 36 yrs in this great city of Mumbai a city with a great contrast where richest of rich and the poorest of poor live. We reach out to the poorest of poor with the love of Christ to bring healing to the broken hearted. We also encourage young and the adults from the west to come to Mumbai to work with us during their vacation time. We would love to have you come with your friends to work with us during your vacation time. I am sure you will have a life changing experience. My email id is: dhwankhede(at)gmail(dot)com and my name is Diwakar Wankhede. Looking forward to hear from you very soon. God's richest blessings on you, your family and friends. And also wishing you a blessed and a Christ centered New yeawr.
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